Furman at Wofford Negative Nancy Thread

[greenvegas]

Ayers was the mastermind behind the midget-misdirection-Chinese fire drill- three ring circus- Wofford offense of years past.

[FUBeAR]

Y’know…we have some statuary of our own…and FUBeAR knows both of these have traveled well as havoc was wreaked in the past.


Statue Battle Royale?

[Fred Garvin]

Legend has it that the Doughboy statue lost his rifle in the late 1950's

[FUBeAR]

Legend has it that the Doughboy statue lost his rifle in the late 1950's

He’s been through more hell and seen more action on Furman’s campus than he ever did over there in the Argonne.

[FUTex]

So....

Its our Doughboy and Rose Garden Cupid against their Viet Ayers statue. This will be a tough one.

Bootie, do you think a mojo can be gathered around raising a fist like throwing a grenade (a la Doughboy) whilst smiling seraphically (a la cupid)? Scientifically speaking, can this produce an effective mojo? Otherwise, we might have to shove an M80 grenade simulator up a little dog's rectum to gather some power. I, for one, have grown weary of that annual exercise. Sparky is weary of it too.

[cavedweller2]

I would advise against invoking the Rose Garden Angel Fountain. I know. Long story short in the long ago past I cut multiple 5 gallon buckets of beautiful roses. Pruning the bushes and actually learning something not taught in a botany class. Yet I digress. The “cherub” moves. It also makes sound. I shit you not.

[cavedweller2]

DPLOT
The Doughboy answers to the Rose Garden Cherub Angel. Just sayin.

[Bootie]

So....

Its our Doughboy and Rose Garden Cupid against their Viet Ayers statue. This will be a tough one.

Bootie, do you think a mojo can be gathered around raising a fist like throwing a grenade (a la Doughboy) whilst smiling seraphically (a la cupid)? Scientifically speaking, can this produce an effective mojo? Otherwise, we might have to shove an M80 grenade simulator up a little dog's rectum to gather some power. I, for one, have grown weary of that annual exercise. Sparky is weary of it too.

You got my attention with the M80. I think this is the proper direction. I have an abundance of -- I mean, a few explosives here on the Possum Kingdom compound we can utilize. But frankly I don't want to deal with the mess of involving the dog again, so let's see what else we can muster up.

[FUTex]

Okay, the Rose Garden Angel statue has done got a demon in it, so we can't that statuary. Now we're down to using the Doughboy or shoving an M80 in that doggy again.

I have a neighbor that has a Boston Terrier named Bilbo. That dog is a little asshole. Just thought you'd like to know.

[Flagman]

When I was but a wee little Paladin, my neighbor’s Boston terrier was named Peggy. Seem to represent the present day who-fords better.

[FUTex]

When I was but a wee little Paladin, my neighbor’s Boston terrier was named Peggy. Seem to represent the present day who-fords better.

Are you suggesting we strap on Bilbo and then peggy the Wofford Terrier instead of shoving an M80 all up in it? That could work. That way we could keep the Doughboy in reserve for Asiatic Ayers.

I can't tell you how many times I passed the Doughboy at midnight with a six of Weidemanns ($2.99 at BoNats) off to play a few holes.

[Fred Garvin]

If you stare at the Asian Ayers long enough it morphs into John Wayne in "The Conqueror." Hidden mojo in that statue. I say we bring in the Charles Townes statue off of Main Street that has a hidden laser in the anal cavity. It would defeat Asian Ayers.

I got hammered with Charlie Gertz on more than one occasion.
Jack Roper, you're no Charlie fn Gertz!!!

[FUBeAR]

If you stare at the Asian Ayers long enough it morphs into John Wayne in "The Conqueror." Hidden mojo in that statue. I say we bring in the Charles Townes statue off of Main Street that has a hidden laser in the anal cavity. It would defeat Asian Ayers.

I got hammered with Charlie Gertz on more than one occasion.
Jack Roper, you're no Charlie fn Gertz!!!

While a laser sounds sweet - even an anal laser - acquiring, transporting, and deploying this…

…looks as if it could be quite a challenge for Bootie. The IDF Lady Commando Team, as you might imagine, is completely out of pocket now.

It seems Tyler Huff could have some free time this week/weekend. Should Bootie add him to the Team for this Herculean mojo deployment effort? Any other ideas?

[tim]

There once was major Mojo around Snider field on the Woffy campus. I think it is still there? Legend says Sheridan lost a game badly there but the Mojo was removed afterward and he went on a major win streak . In the past, I have removed SOCON Mojo by circling Sirrine Stadium and looking through the fence at the spot where Stump Mitchell was stopped giving FU their first title. Could Mojo removal involve old Sirrine and old Snider?

[FUTex]

A major mojo around Snyder Field? Holy Moly. I had no idea. This mojo build for the Wofford game is becoming entangled in complexities. The Paladins may have to resort to the ol' Pell Mell play to get a W this Saturday.

FAWNNT BATT CCLOT